Small babies and young toddlers are notorious for their beautiful spirit and infectious joy, which comes from knowing little about the world in which they live. Babies need nothing but love, and the essentials – nourishment, shelter, security. As children grow and learn more about the world throughout the years, they begin to want more than just our love and the essentials.
In her book, "Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World", Kristen Welch states, “When our kids begin to expect – even demand – more than our love, that’s when we have a problem. What our culture feels entitled to isn’t just stuff. It’s the desire to fit in, to feel good or happy all the time; it’s the desire for instant gratification and the demand to receive something just because we want it, hard work optional.”
In a materialistic world focused on having the latest and greatest, the biggest and best, our children are headed down a dangerous path of being robbed of their joy. Consider this: if a child grows up with the mindset of always needing more, never sitting with contentment, never practicing true gratitude, we are inadvertently telling them that life is meant to serve them. They will be completely unprepared to enter the “real world” where hard work is necessary and important, and things are not handed to them.
Children of the “selfie” generation have a completely different view of the world than prior generations; they often place themselves in the center of the universe where their entitlement rises above other needs and priorities.
“Kids grow up in a reality-show world, thinking of themselves as the central character on the stage. They have a Facebook page, they are famous in their own minds, they are like rock stars, and to them there is no room (and no need) for true emotional empathy, or self-examination, or personal responsibility. Nor is there incentive or motivation to learn to work. And they think they are entitled not to have limits or boundaries or discipline.” State Richard and Linda Eyre in, "The Entitlement Trap".
As a parent, it is so hard to balance the desire to please our children with the need to help our children learn to deal with disappointment. It seems that by giving them gifts and other material things, we are making them happy… but only in the moment. When children are given too much too soon, they will take it, and as a result we build up their notion of what they ought to have… what they are entitled to have. This is a difficult reality to face, because it calls us to focus in on our children’s character, to focus in on how to help our children to be grateful and content, to be happy and joyful without needing “more.”
How do we do this? How do we take such a huge task – helping our children be grateful – and put it into practice in our daily lives? Here are three practical ways to help your children feel less entitled and be more grateful:
Children of the “selfie” generation have a completely different view of the world than prior generations; they often place themselves in the center of the universe where their entitlement rises above other needs and priorities.
“Kids grow up in a reality-show world, thinking of themselves as the central character on the stage. They have a Facebook page, they are famous in their own minds, they are like rock stars, and to them there is no room (and no need) for true emotional empathy, or self-examination, or personal responsibility. Nor is there incentive or motivation to learn to work. And they think they are entitled not to have limits or boundaries or discipline.” State Richard and Linda Eyre in, "The Entitlement Trap".
As a parent, it is so hard to balance the desire to please our children with the need to help our children learn to deal with disappointment. It seems that by giving them gifts and other material things, we are making them happy… but only in the moment. When children are given too much too soon, they will take it, and as a result we build up their notion of what they ought to have… what they are entitled to have. This is a difficult reality to face, because it calls us to focus in on our children’s character, to focus in on how to help our children to be grateful and content, to be happy and joyful without needing “more.”
How do we do this? How do we take such a huge task – helping our children be grateful – and put it into practice in our daily lives? Here are three practical ways to help your children feel less entitled and be more grateful:
