" Toddler: No, I don’t want you to get coffee! You: Well, I didn’t want you to use your hands to cover yourself with dirt right before we left, but you did that anyway didn’t you? Toddler: I DON’T WANT YOU TO GET COFFEE! " Toddler: Daddy! Were you even listening to me? You: No. It doesn’t feel so great does it? Toddler: EEERRRRMM! " Toddler: The baby is too loud for my ears! You: Ha! That’s pretty rich coming from you. Toddler: TOO LOUD! " Toddler: I don’t like you to say that! You: Welcome to my life. Toddler: I’m taking off my shoes!! " Toddler: I want you to go outside! You: I want you to listen to me for once. Toddler: OUTSIDE!! " Toddler: I want a cookie! You: Hmm, last time I checked, cookies weren’t a breakfast food, so no. Toddler: I’m putting this pencil on the floor! " Toddler: Turn on all the lights! You: It’s 4 a.m. The only light you need is your night light so you can go back to sleep. Toddler: It’s too bright. You: The night light is too bright, but all the other lights in the house provide just the right amount of illumination? Seems legit. Toddler: I’m closing my eyes! " Toddler: I want to watch Daniel Tiger! You: Sorry, it’s not on right now. Toddler: It’s on Netflix! You: No, it's not. Toddler: Yes, it is! Toddler: There it is! I told you it was in Netflix! You: Joke’s on you, dude. It was on Amazon, not Netflix. Nice try though. Toddler: Ha-ha. Told you so!
"Toddler: No, I don’t want you to get coffee!You: Well, I didn’t want you to use your hands to cover yourself with dirt right before we left, but you did that anyway didn’t you?Toddler: I DON’T WANT YOU TO GET COFFEE!"Toddler: Daddy! Were you even listening to me?You: No. It doesn’t feel so great does it?Toddler: EEERRRRMM!"Toddler: The baby is too loud for my ears!You: Ha! That’s pretty rich coming from you.Toddler: TOO LOUD!"Toddler: I don’t like you to say that!You: Welcome to my life.Toddler: I’m taking off my shoes!!"Toddler: I want you to go outside!You: I want you to listen to me for once.Toddler: OUTSIDE!!"Toddler: I want a cookie!You: Hmm, last time I checked, cookies weren’t a breakfast food, so no.Toddler: I’m putting this pencil on the floor!"Toddler: Turn on all the lights!You: It’s 4 a.m. The only light you need is your night light so you can go back to sleep.Toddler: It’s too bright.You: The night light is too bright, but all the other lights in the house provide just the right amount of illumination? Seems legit.Toddler: I’m closing my eyes!"Toddler: I want to watch Daniel Tiger!You: Sorry, it’s not on right now.Toddler: It’s on Netflix!You: No, it's not.Toddler: Yes, it is!Toddler: There it is! I told you it was in Netflix!You: Joke’s on you, dude. It was on Amazon, not Netflix. Nice try though.Toddler: Ha-ha. Told you so!
