Why Starting Sentences with ‘I Feel like’ Is a Conversation Killer

by ParentCo. May 03, 2016

little girl taking on telephone

Pretending that every argument you make is just a hunch you have is self-destructive.
The data suggests that young women use the phrase slightly more often than men, but in my own classes, male students begin almost every statement with “I feel like.” The gender gap is vanishing because the cultural roots of this linguistic shift were never primarily a consequence of gender.

“I feel like” masquerades as a humble conversational offering, an invitation to share your feelings, too — but the phrase is an absolutist trump card. It halts argument in its tracks.

“It’s a way of deflecting, avoiding full engagement with another person or group,” Elisabeth Lasch-Quinn, a historian at Syracuse University, said, “because it puts a shield up immediately. You cannot disagree.”

Source: Stop Saying ‘I Feel Like’


ParentCo.

Author



Also in Conversations

mother with child
How Teaching Goal Setting Inspires Children

by Joy Turner

Setting goals allows kids to experience growth socially and emotionally by helping them develop self-regulation skills, gain responsibility and build confidence.

Continue Reading

mother with child outside
Ensuring Safe Toys and Gear for your Little One

by Hannah Howard

Since not all companies are scrupulous, here’s how parents can make sure the products they buy for their family are safe. Shop from brands you trust.

Continue Reading

mother and daughter doing yoga
Choosing Rhythms Over Resolutions

by Hannah Brencher

Parenting is about flow, sustainable habits, and family values—not rigid goals and resolutions and left me feeling like a failure when I didn’t hit the mark.

Continue Reading