The holidays are a time for joy, family, friends and gift-giving. However, amid the excitement, it's important to teach your child how to receive presents with grace and gratitude. It's not just about good manners — it's about fostering appreciation, encouraging positive social interactions and building strong relationships. Here are five tips to help your child become a gracious gift receiver, no matter their age.
It seems simple, but a heartfelt "thank you" is the cornerstone of gracious gift receiving. Practice saying it with your child beforehand, and remind them to express gratitude after they receive a present. This includes showing them how to make eye contact, smile and say "thank you" sincerely.
Encourage your child to move beyond a simple "thank you" by teaching them to mention something specific about the gift. For example, saying, "Thank you for the book. I love the colorful pictures!" shows the giver that your child has taken the time to notice details and appreciate their present.
Sometimes, kids may not know what to say when they receive a gift, especially if they’re unsure how they feel about it. For such moments, teach them a few go-to phrases they can use to express gratitude politely, even if they’re feeling uncertain, such as “Thank you for thinking of me!” and “I can’t wait to use this.” Having these phrases handy can help your child feel more prepared and less anxious about how to respond when the time comes.
Once the excitement of the holidays wanes, sit down with your kids and write thank-you notes. For younger children, this could be a drawing with a simple "thank you" written on it. Older children can write more detailed letters. Following up this way helps reinforce the lesson that every act of kindness deserves recognition. It’s also a fun activity that allows them to unwind after the active holiday season.
It’s easy for children to get caught up in the excitement of the celebrations and focus only on the gifts. This often detracts from the entire experience, with everything else taking second place. Remind them that the holidays are about spending time with loved ones, enjoying seasonal traditions and creating memories. By shifting the focus away from material things, your child will be less likely to express disappointment over presents and more likely to enjoy the spirit of giving and receiving.
Sometimes, even with the best intentions, gifts won't be exactly what your child hoped for. Find ways to help them understand that it's not about the object itself but rather the thought and effort put into choosing it. Encourage them to think about why someone might have selected that particular item for them. This shift in perspective makes it easier for kids to react positively, no matter what’s inside the wrapping paper.
When they receive a gift they don't like, teach them that it's OK to feel disappointed but not to show it openly. Encourage them to still say "thank you" and focus on the positive aspects, like the thoughtfulness behind the present. Come up with a signal or code word they can use if they need a moment to compose themselves. Later, in private, discuss their feelings and show them how to handle similar situations in the future.
One of the best ways to teach graciousness is to involve your child in giving gifts. When they participate in choosing, wrapping and giving presents, they experience the joy of making someone else happy. This hands-on experience can help them understand that the real reward of gifting comes from the act, not just the item itself. Sharing the joy of gift-receiving deepens the connection and inspires a love for giving.
The ceremonial aspects of gift exchanges provide excellent opportunities for children to cultivate social skills and build meaningful relationships. These interactions naturally boost their self-esteem, resilience and confidence in social situations.
After the gift-giving event, take time to talk with your child about how they felt and reacted. Ask them how they think people felt when they expressed gratitude. Prompting kids to reflect on their behavior helps reinforce what they’ve learned and opens the door for more meaningful conversations about kindness and empathy.
Consider making appreciation a year-round practice by saying “thank you” in everyday situations. Whether it's thanking someone for a snack, a favor or simply for spending time with them, the more they practice gratefulness, the easier it will be for them to extend this attitude toward receiving gifts.
When your youngster successfully navigates a gift-giving situation gracefully, be sure to praise their efforts. Positive reinforcement inspires them to continue practicing these behaviors in the future. Celebrating small victories will make them feel more confident and motivated to be gracious in other aspects of their life.
Children learn a lot from watching how adults behave, especially their parents. This is why it’s important to model the behavior you want them to adopt.
When you receive gifts, show them what gracious receiving looks like. Express genuine gratitude, even if the item isn’t something you necessarily wanted. Use this as an opportunity to explain how you’re focusing on the thought and effort behind the present.
Modeling this behavior gives your child a real-life example of how to respond politely and kindly. They'll likely mimic your attitude and reactions, making the process feel more natural when it’s their turn to receive presents.
Helping kids develop the skill of gracious gift-receiving is an ongoing process but will serve them well throughout life. Setting expectations, practicing gratitude and focusing on the thought behind the present will help your child grow into someone who can receive — and give — gifts with kindness and grace, no matter the occasion.
Remember, be patient and celebrate all victories as they learn and grow. With consistent guidance and practice, your child will develop the social skills needed to navigate gift-receiving situations, setting the foundation for positive relationships throughout their life.
Mia Barnes
Author